Quick update 

Well, sad to say my step dad weighs less than me now. 

He’s 285, and I am back up to 300+(305 now)

He hasn’t been doing anything to lose any weight, and most of it is muscle, but still. All my life I have struggled with my weight and all I kept telling myself was that I didn’t want to end up as big as him. Now I am there, I have been there and until I found out recently that he weighs less than me, I didn’t feel so bad about myself.

Now, I can’t find any comfort in any clothes. I want to be that person again from my first post,I want to have that motivation,and I’m trying. I can’t though, not right now. I want to, but I can’t.  It hurts. I am in so much pain, my back cannot take my weight. My legs cannot keep the weight either, I am at the point where I feel like if I take anymore steps I will die, and I am scared. 

After New Years I’m going to try again, and not because of a New Years resolution , but as a way to give my body a small, small break. To give my mind a break and let it heal from what I’ve put myself through, because if I don’t do something now, this only gets worse. 

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s